Almost everything a woman knows about her own body arrived in the form of prohibitions. Do not wear that, cover up, what will people think. How to handle your own energy, where your boundaries run and why the body keeps those commands for decades is explained by Peruquois, a leading World Music performer in Australia, musician, composer, and the author and facilitator of personal development trainings for women.
What stood behind the prohibitions
A prohibition was almost always care expressed in the only available form. Behind “do not put that on” stood worry: your energy is visible, the world is not always safe, I do not know how to protect you.
A mother said something other than what she meant, because she had no words of her own. She was raised on the same short commands, and nobody explained to her what to do with that power or how to keep it safe.
A child hears the prohibition literally and draws a conclusion about herself: there is something in me that is better hidden. The message that gets sealed into a daughter's body is one Peruquois lists directly: that you may be unworthy of love, that love is pain, that relationships are pain, that there is not enough love on the planet, that you will have to fight for your share of it, and above all, that you must be good.
Why your mother could not teach it
A woman does not pass on to her daughter what she does not have herself. A mother who lived her life with the sense that her body needed correcting physically cannot demonstrate a different attitude to her daughter, however much she loves her.
“Then we have to become that mother for ourselves now, because our mother did not love herself,” says Peruquois. The chain runs through generations and it breaks exactly where one of the women takes that work on.
Motherhood and sensuality are one state
“Your task is to restore this inner mother in yourself. Because motherhood and sensuality are one thing,” says Peruquois. They are braided together, it is a single state, and it works in both directions: a woman who has lost the connection to her sensuality also loses her motherly wisdom toward herself.
The inner mother is the part of a woman that knows how to accept what is alive in her and grow it with love rather than put it out. She looks at the body warmly and never appraises it.
Her job is quite concrete. A mother's wisdom tells you how to handle your sensual energy: where it can be expressed freely and where it is worth closing. The same wisdom tells you when to say no, and it does so before the reasoning about whether a refusal would be convenient has time to start.
Become the guardian of your energy
“Your energy is very beautiful. And you must be the defender, the guardian of your energy,” says Peruquois. A guardian protects what is valuable, and that is what separates her from a censor, who forbids.
Hence her formula: express your beauty and know where your boundaries are. This has nothing to do with the length of a skirt.
One woman goes out into the world open because it feels good to her and because that is how she is alive. Another puts on the same thing in order to finally be noticed, because inside there is emptiness and something has to be collected in return. The dress is identical, the states are opposite, and the inner mother tells them apart instantly.
Her question is always the same: am I sharing right now, or am I collecting. The honest answer is usually known immediately, before any explanation turns up.
The connection to the body
Peruquois sets one condition: a woman has to be in contact with her female center, with the womb. The inner mother speaks from there, and her voice is physical. If the connection is lost, all you hear is reasoning, and reasoning will always find a reason to agree to what should not have been agreed to.
That is why her practices give so much attention to the lower belly. The warmth of a palm below the navel, deep breathing downward, calm presence in that place with no appraisal at all. The body responds to that quickly, and the inner mother responds with it.
Women who rebuild that connection notice the change in ordinary things before they notice it in the large ones. Refusing becomes easier. The urge to explain and justify drops away. The taste for your own reflection comes back, and not for anyone else's eyes.
The chain ends with you
A maternal line passes down to a daughter what the mother had. If the mother had no love for herself, the daughter receives prohibitions, her daughter receives the same ones, and so on until the woman who decides to end the chain on herself.
That is the entire work: to become, for your own body, the mother you did not have. The one who accepts and protects.
If you want to bring back the sense of your own beauty from the inside, Peruquois has a course called You Are Beautiful. You will find it on her website under Courses.
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